After much deliberation following England's terrific 2 - 1 loss against Russia last night, it is with a heavy heart that the staff at eatfootball have decided to shut up shop and concentrate instead on a sport that this fine country is actually good at. Ladies and Gentlemen, we give to you: eatdarts.net.

We will be reviewing this situation through the bottom of a glass on the 17th of November, but until then, here's the latest exciting darts news:

Darts Player Found not to be Taking Performance Debilitating Drugs
A top darts players drink was last night sent for analysis after insiders were shocked to observe it contained no alcohol at all. A ban is likely to follow.

Phil 'The Power' Taylor Reviews New Fosters Super Chilled - 'Tastes like cold cat piss' - Phil