 At the recent opening of Arsenal's Emirates Stadium, Gunners stars past and present gathered for an inspection of the new ground. However, but for some ingenuity reminiscent of 80's TV show 'The A Team', some of the main protagonists would have missed the event entirely.
Manager Arsene Wenger greeted the arrivals, and offered to take a few of his guests, Robert Pires, Paul Merson and Denis Bergkamp, on a guided tour. All was well as they inspected the gleaming corridors and rooms beneath the new stadium, that is, until they entered the groundsman's office and storeroom. Here, when they'd finished looking around, they found some shoddy workmanship had led to the door being firmly stuck behind them. Panic set in amongst the trapped quartet, with Wenger acutely aware that he was due at a screening of a Speksavers ad in a matter of minutes.
Ingenuity then came into play, with the sleek, sophisticated 'soldier for hire', Robert 'Face' Pires suggesting an escape attempt. Mad 'Murdoch' Merson set to work creating some impromptu rockets using some discarded Lucozade bottles and the groundsman's fertilizer. The barrage was launched, the door weakened, and riding through the barricade on a motorised grass-cutter, the Gunners legends were free. Wenger, the grey haired leader of the gang just had time to utter 'I love it when a plan comes together', before scuttling off to the reception party, shouting 'We must fly like the wind to get there on time!'. Predictably, as this article draws to a close, ' B.A' Bergkamp replied 'I ain't gettin' on no plane, you crazy fool'.
If you've got a problem, and nobody else can help, maybe you can hire.... the A-team.
By Matt Warnes
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